The Night Before Thanksgiving

The night before thanksgiving
And I'm here
The devil's been knocking
At my heart
Or has it been myself
Causing my pain
Wanting what I think looks like
What a man of 32 should have

Then, I think of the selfishness
That I have been portraying
Into the people I love the most
I get to the point of depression
I feel very heavy in spirit

Then, remember!
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving
My favorite day next to Resurrection Day
The prophet Isaiah screams to us

Put it on... Put it on... Put it on...

The garment of praise!!!
Please, oh God help me put it on


Psalm 6 - the Measage by Eugene Petersen

1-2 Please, God, no more yelling, no more trips to the woodshed.
Treat me nice for a change;
I'm so starved for affection.

2-3 Can't you see I'm black-and-blue,
beat up badly in bones and soul?
God, how long will it take
for you to let up?

4-5 Break in, God, and break up this fight;
if you love me at all, get me out of here.
I'm no good to you dead, am I?
I can't sing in your choir if I'm buried in some tomb!

6-7 I'm tired of all this—so tired. My bed
has been floating forty days and nights
On the flood of my tears.
My mattress is soaked, soggy with tears.
The sockets of my eyes are black holes;
nearly blind, I squint and grope.

I just read this tonight

Thank God this is in the Bible

David seems to know what

This horrible emmotions

I have been through

8-9 Get out of here, you Devil's crew: at last God has heard my sobs. My requests have all been granted, my prayers are answered.
10 Cowards, my enemies disappear. Disgraced, they turn tail and run.

Here is the praise
God has heard my growning
Praise God who alone knows
He has answered all of my prayers
My request have been granted
According to His will and pleasure!
The enemies of my souls that are all around
Have to flee
When we praise God
For actually lending His ear
To lowly sinners like us

My Selfish Year

Wow, even giving this post a name is humiliating but that is exactly what this year has been. I think I have hurt everybody I truly care about in the process of being the most anti Christ I have ever been. Just have been studying in Daniel about the end time antiChrist. That is where that came from.

Jesus Christ - the meaning of selfless living. I saw this came to life more vividly than I have in my life.

First, me, the anti of everything that is holy and right in my mind wanting what is not mine to have... Focusing on my pain and causing others pain.

Jesus Christ, saw people in their pain and willingly laid down His life to become a sacrifice for others...

I saw the Spirit of Christ at work in my mom this past Friday. She was in a situation that I know wasn't easy for her to be in but acted like Jesus... Thank you, Mom...

Uncle Johnny

Hardest Thing

Watching you writhe
Watching knowing I can't do what I would love to
And take away the pain
That has so ravaged your body.

Jesus please come to his room.
Just one touch of Your garment
Healed the woman who reached
Lord I'm reaching for You
Please let your garment touch his sick body

Johnny Owen
Tonight as I sit here and recall
The times I sat in amazement of your fingers
As you strum this instrument I have grown to love
The acustic guitar and then you used to pick up the banjo and wow!
What I would do to hear you do that again.

But no.
Even though you won't do that.
Those same fingers were the sign of peace and rest
When you squeezed them tightly
It was like u knew
I was there. I hope you did.

Johnny
I love you and pray
You know how much.
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